The Horoscope as Dumb Tweets I’ve Bookmarked
Aries
”Recently almost quoted Kierkegaard at someone in anger. That was a dark day”
@michaelcurzi
Taurus
”they can never put a tariff on my Love for you”
@seriallimerant
Gemini
“There's memes I want to send to you, but I'll just let you live....”
@laylology
Cancer
”Jesus also ‘fell off’ for 3 days”
@em0dads_
Leo
“‘what a nerd’ i say while being a nerd myself”
@rmfm__
Virgo
“bro last night was the writer's poorly disguised fetish”
@auntiecunty
Libra
”I aim to rectify that, playboy”
@lolt64
Scorpio
”no babe i love your favourite baseball team. the good ones scare me”
@mahaaaay
Sagittarius
”of course there’s a gap in the literature. that’s how the light gets in”
@confusionm8trix
Capricorn
“not now babe it's my google maps time”
@essenaccount
Aquarius
”i was neglecting my root chakra at the time your honor”
@SELFIMMOLATI0N
Pisces
“I don’t believe the phrase ‘if they wanted to they would’ because I want to and I don’t”
@motheyed
