Fun Fact of the Week: On the Construction of a Sand Castle

Say, hypothetically, you are not a lord with considerable wealth in late-1200s England or Wales; you are instead a college student with limited financial means, but who still possesses considerable desire to construct a magnificent castle. Perhaps the simplest alternative to the traditional stone and mortar option is a sand castle. Renowned for its elegance, simplicity, and classic appeal, the sand castle is easy enough for a child to conceptualize, yet can attain da Vinci levels of sculpted complexity. So let’s make one. 

The first step is to get some sand. The Willamette does not offer a great selection of sandy beaches (unless you can boat over to Ross Island somehow), although as a Portlander I can recommend Sauvie Island Beach off NW Reeder Rd. if you can stand the ~30 minute drive (hey, it’s closer than the coast), it’s quite pleasant on a sunny day. There’s also a clothing-optional beach a short walk down the river. Be warned and/or prepared. 

As any good cook, chemist, carpenter, Minecrafter, or inventor will tell you, always make sure you have your construction ingredients on hand before beginning your project. We already have the sand, and if you’re at a beach, you’ll have the water, but bringing the correct tools for the job is paramount. Shovels are optional, unless you’re going big or hoping to keep your hands clean (you will fail). What is not optional, however, is a ruler. Sculpting will become infinitely more refined with the simple addition of a straight edge. 

The quality of sand can drastically alter the ease of construction of your castle. Typically, finer sand will allow for finer detail and greater structural stability (pebbly beaches are simply not suitable). In addition to sand, the key to good construction is water. In essence, when constructing a sand castle, you will create concrete. Sure, it might not have some fancy, and some would say important, elements such as cement, or other such chemical binding agents, but concrete is mostly just tiny rocks and water. 

As with all real estate, location is everything. Beachfront property is superior to the high and dry land farther up the beach, as easy access to the water table will make castle construction easier. Just make sure you’re aware of the high tide mark if you’re at the coast. Your castle will be destroyed eventually, however, premature dissolution is typically an unhappy affair. 

Once a location has been selected, we may finally begin construction of the castle itself. In order to go up, you must first go down, so we shall begin by digging a hole down to the water table. If you’ve chosen your location well, this should be no more than one foot deep. 

It’s important to note that this hole should be a couple of feet away from where the castle itself is going to be, as the hole will expand more than you think it will. It always does, no matter how much you prepare, so err on the side of caution. 

Scoop sand out of the hole and into a mound where you want the castle to be. For optimal structural stability, be sure to pat the mound down occasionally. Heck, give it a good punching to get your anger out if you have some to spare; your rage will only make it stronger. 

Humans and sand castles are very similar in the regard that they both need far more water to construct than an alien might suspect at a glance. When constructing the mound, draw sand from underneath the water table. It should be a wet mush. Slop it onto the mound and wait for it to dry; on a sunny day, this should be quite rapid. This technique will create structurally stable castle walls, perfect for carving, as you are basically making concrete without the additives. 

Eventually, begin shaping the approximately normal (see Central Limit Theorem, Math 141) mound into whatever shape you’d like the castle to be. Continue packing the sand on until it reaches a few inches more than the desired dimensions. Then, we sculpt. 

This is where the ruler really comes in handy and the artistic vision takes over. Carve away small amounts of sand using gentle slicing motions until the walls of the structure reveal themselves to you. If you’ve done a good job using wet sand and packing well, then clean vertical edges and, perhaps, even slight overhangs, should be achievable. 

Carve out walls, turrets, merlons, towers, and anything else you might want to add. Getting a feel for how strong the sand is will let you know what feats of engineering are available to you on a particular day. 

For decoration, adding shells, sticks and feathers is a must. Beyond that, carving little windows and doors into towers is quite charming. If you so desire, you can also carve out the interior of the castle, and if you really want to test your skill, you can dig a hole through one of the walls to make a portcullis. Your castle is now almost complete. 

One last trick of the trade is to flatten the area surrounding the castle once the final touches have been added. This will make the whole construction seem much more professional and put together, and it is surprisingly effective at making the castle more photogenic. 

Finally, pose for a photo, reflect on the journey of creation and the impermanence of beauty, and then watch as your work is destroyed by waves, thrashed by children, and pissed on by dogs. 

Sourced mostly from Sand-tiquity by Malcolm and Kappy Wells. If you have a fun fact or topic that you would like to be brought to light, email me at qhoop@reed.edu!